Teams We're Not Picking On: Minnesota

From some cube-farm in central Texas:

"This brings us to Minnesota."
"Who?"
"You know squirrelly-looking rodents that tear up golf courses."
"Oh Yeah."
"Well, apparently through some glitch in the system, they got picked on twice last year..."

For the Golden Gophers this season looks like its going to be brutal, again. Last in every unit ranking except one and that's only b/c Iowa had to "let some people go"... Hiring a former (read: fired) Duke head coach Ted [the] Roof [is on fire!] to "improve" the D is seen as possibly (again, read: "it's really that bad? perhaps we should consider swapping leagues with ND State") a positive. And how in the hell did Goldie not make the twenty least intimidating mascots? Rivals sums up the Gophers in their review of the secondary:

"Start dialing 9-1-1. This unit was an unmitigated disaster in 2007. Aside from an inability to cover or tackle, this was a great secondary. Look for myriad newcomers to comprise a unit that remains a work-in-progress."

Because of W13 Bylaws, we will be picking on exactly one Minnesota game this year.