Seven Things Not to Do

This is a brief summary of things not to do to keep us all safe this weekend:

1. Mix bleach and ammonia
2. Light fire crackers in your hand
3. Clean the lion cage wearing a suit made of beef jerky
4. Rush the field after your heavily-favored 15th ranked team beat an unranked 2-2 opponent
5. Talk trash to Oklahoma, especially if you go to a Christian school
6. Clean the polar bear cage with a suit made of seal jerky
7. Wear a Michigan jersey into the Columbus Flying J truck stop

Thank you and be safe!